To “Pouch” or Not to “Pouch”

 

In the past couple of years, underwear with pouches to accommodate the male anatomy has become very popular. These come in all sorts of styles and fabrics, from cotton boxer briefs, jammer-style to Lycra square-cuts and briefs.

 

In this world, a properly-designed pouch for containing the male anatomy should never have a fly or opening. Given the underwear design, this can make logistics at the urinal difficult if not overwhelming. At the urinal it is possible to get out over the top elastic band with the small briefs that lack a fly, but the logistics of doing this with a higher to the waist fitting boxer brief becomes all but impossible. If anyone has figured out any reasonable logistics on this--that is, the fly-less pouch boxer-brief w/o going into a stall and pulling your pants and shorts completely down, I would be interested in hearing.

 

However, if the brief gets too skimpy, it tends to pull everything down and back, making it look like you might have a very small anatomy or even be missing part of your anatomy, and this is not a look a lot of guys like for obvious reasons. The proper pouch pushes up from the perineum area, and pushes balls and penis up into the pouch, enhancing what you have. This makes you look sexy and gives you a nice smooth bulge when the situation arises where you want to "drop trousers" (as Janice Dickinson would say on her reality modeling show--see below). Even jeans often look better with this kind of "support" underneath from penis and balls in the pouch.

 

 I suppose Aussiebum has taken all of this to the extreme in terms of the lift-up-and-push forward idea for men with their Wonderjock. In the Janice Dickinson Modeling agency episode (appearing first on A&E but in re-runs on the Oxygen Channel) Dickinson was entertaining Sean Ashby, the Aussiebum founder and president, and trying to help him find models for a planned Wonderjock campaign.

 

Meanwhile however, if you want to play around and see how your anatomy might look in a conventional and widely available pouch design in Lycra/poly not cotton you can try the Jockey/Life brand of sculptured pouch Microfiber (All $6.96 ea in blue, red, gray and black) that comes in a brief style, a small square cut, and a square cut with longer legs. One of the interesting things that happens is that with both penis and balls in the pouch, even the less amply endowed guys are going to end up looking pretty good--part of what was going on in the Wonderjock/Aussiebum  ad/modeling campaign, and part of the trick here is finding a pair that have just the right pouch size for your specific anatomy--also what was under discussion in the reality show episode--some of the guys looked great in the Wonderjock, others, well, lets just say they oversized the Wonderjock and as a consequence, everything  ended up looking less than great. I might also add that the effect is the best with just a bit of a "semi".

 

This is something of the male analog to the problem women have in mating bra sizes to their anatomy, and finding a combination that makes smaller women look sexy. for men, (unlike women, most men don't care how their anatomy looks to others at all LOL) underwear is still sized according to waist size only, but if this trend keeps up much longer we will probably soon begin to see underwear for men  sized not only by waist size but by pouch size as well...IE you will be able to buy a 32 inch waist with an "A", "B" "C" or for the really amply endowed "D" pouch. Women agonize over this specific problem constantly, (the smaller women all want to look bigger and sexier, whereas the big, amply endowed women generally don't want to look too big) and they have for generations, but the idea ofm men agonizing over this has only recently hit the mainstream.

 

I've long observed that jocks with hard cups basically come in only two sizes, "youth" and "large" The cups in the youth sizes are smaller and fit tighter than the adult cups, but the size of the hard cup does not increase with the waist size. An XL (38-42 in) "Adult: will have the exact same sized cup as the "Small" (26-32) Adult jock strap has. This is interesting, because it says that the size of the male anatomy covered by the cup statistically does not vary with waist size, and the XL adult is assumed to have the same size penis as the SM guy has.

 

Go figure, we all know that the adult male anatomy varies all over the place in terms of size, but all are forced to wear the same sized cup, at least for any particular brand of jock strap. The idea of fitting a guy to a specific cup size has not taken off in men as it has in women--and the consequence is that most guys are probably wearing a poorly fitting hard cup, either too small or too big. (Of course I have always had fun with slightly too small cups but that is a story for another day http://www.sebringsil.com/others.htm

 

Not all guys’ anatomies will fill out the fairly large pouches of many of the current designs. One option is to find a snug-fitting cotton thong (a size smaller than you would ordinarily wear, works well) and slip that on underneath your pouched brief. The correctly-sized thong will press upward on the perineum area just behind your scrotum, and as a consequence push all your equipment front and forward. This in itself can be a really interesting sensation, as your equipment is squeezed forward into the now much more snugly-fitting pouch. Not only will you probably start to feel pretty good as a consequence, but your appearance “down there” will be improved as well, as you will appear to be much more amply endowed. You probably will be too, given the sensations you will likely experience.

 

In addition to impressing one's partner I should also mention the fact that pouch briefs and other pouch underwear are fun to sleep in because the parts of your anatomy that you really want to get to during the night and play with are right up there where you can get at them.  Personally, I have had an immense amount of fun with this type of nightly play and would highly recommend it to those who have not yet tried it if you have not--it can turn an otherwise boring night into something pretty special.

 

OK so the typical Speedo or Tyr brief designed for swimming in the public feature pouches, but these pouches are commonplace in underwear with a very similar cut and material (See the Jockey/Life reference above).

 

I am trying to determine what the so-called "rules" are in this regard. If I show up at a pool in a skimpy Lycra Speedo in red, gray, blue or black no one will say a word because that is a swimsuit. However, if I show up in one of the Jockey/Life Lycra pouch briefs or square cuts (see above) in similar colors and what appears to be the same material, this is a no-no because I am appearing in public in what is underwear not a swimming brief. The only difference is that the latter has a sewn-in pouch missing from the brief designed for swimming. So whether nor not what I have on has a pouch or not determines if it is suitable for swimming.

 

Then there are the jammers. I have some longer, what I would call workout shorts made from Lycra/poly that fit almost to the knee. Oddly enough, I got these at Wal-Mart too. They look just like a black Lycra/poly swimming  jammer EXCEPT that they have a nice sewn in pouch. I gather that since these have a built-in pouch I am not supposed to wear these at the gym or in public without covering them, with, say another pair for cotton shorts or something similar. I also have some really snug fitting swimming jammers from Speedo and Tyr. These look a lot like the workout shorts except that there is no sewn in pouch, so the effect is to push my equipment back and make my anatomy look "flatter" Again, if I show up at a pool wearing my jammers everything is fine, but if I showed up instead with my similarly designed and material workout shorts that is a no-no because they have a sewn in pouch to accommodate my anatomy.

 

Or are we about to embark on a new trend that would say soon the major competitive swimwear manufacturers will begin to offer Lycra briefs and jammers with pouches like the jockey/life items I have been finding at Wal-Mart. I suppose that some of this is a technical issue in competitive swimming in that having parts of ones anatomy pushed forward could increase drag in a swimming competition, and the current generation of Lycra briefs and jammers are designed to make the guy's body as smooth with as low a drag as possible.

 

In a movie is called "Pride," (March 23rd 2007) in which a competitive swim team at a black school is formed. And of course what's got to be the most interesting scene for the guys here is when the coach asks the big black guys to wear Snug-fitting Speedo briefs in competition and one guy complains that his" boys" will be uncomfortable in that type of suit. But the coach tells the guy that his "boys" will survive just fine

 

Obviously it could be that a lot of the current objections many guys seem to have to wearing Speedos relates to the fact that they believe that their male anatomy will be uncomfortable in such a design. Yet as I now look around these new pouch designs have suddenly become very popular, even without a fly and the tricky logistics that presents in front of the urinal.

 

Survey practically any store selling men’s underwear from Wal-Mart to high end department stores and you will see these pouch designs in poly/Lycra, Lycra cotton blends and even all cotton suddenly appearing everywhere. I guess a lot of guys have figured out urinal logistics wearing a fly-less pouch in a not-so-low fitting cotton boxer brief...either that or men who wear these aren't using urinals any more.

 

So, swimwear manufacturers such as Speedo, Arena and Tyr can't be ignoring this newfound popularity of the fly-less pouch designs. I realize some of the specialty men’s swimwear makers already offer designs with pouches, I haven't seen anything from the major competitive manufacturers—yet. Meanwhile, Aussiebum has had great success in the past year with their Wonderjock, and I can't believe that direct knockoffs in that design will soon appear as well.

 

David Sebringsil  sebringsil@aol.com

 

http://www.sebringsil.com